What is this?
Who am I?
The Many Faces of the One: article 11 - the unpublished esoteric writings of an aging yogi.
"I make a conscious daily connection with the love and wisdom of pure 'Spirit'. I am always centred in the love and wisdom of pure 'Spirit'. The love and wisdom of pure 'Spirit' is always establishing harmony and peace in my world. I always allow the blessing and grace of pure 'Spirit's' love and wisdom to support and guide me in every area and facet of my embodied life. I am always fully open and receptive to 'Spirit's' love and wisdom. I live my life in the full recognition and knowing of pure 'Spirit'. I radiate pure 'Spirit' at all times, in all places and in all my thoughts, deeds and actions. I am always deeply connected and at one with pure 'Spirit'. OM, shanti, shanti, shanti. 'I am', peace, peace peace."
"I-am. Life is. I am one with all life and all life is one with me. Oneness in body. Oneness in mind."
continuing from the unpublished esoteric collected writings and works of article 10
KNOWING REALITY FOR WHAT IT IS
Despite our sometimes flawed and imperfect existence and all the worldly challenges, demands and changes that come with having a self-aware embodied mind/body experience that finds itself expectantly or unexpectedly in a conceptual and conditioned world of change, conditionality, duality and consequence, we can only really know and have the knowing of experience and experiencing by there being a temporary self-aware embodied so-called subject of experience to recognize and know it, even if it is all unreal and empty of anything permanent.
Yes, it is flawed in that having the experience of an embodied self-aware individualized self brings with it the painful knowledge and truth of its own futility and mental anguish of clinging, grasping and attaching to conceptual and conditioned life and the mind/body experience, with the self-realization and knowing that it too is impersonal, empty, transitory and temporary. In a certain way, individualized self-awareness is itself a double-edged sword in that it can successfully and permanently cut through the illusory lies and false promises of all that conditioned and conceptual life appears to have to offer us in the need for permanent happiness, love, reward, peace, success, recognition, praise and fulfilment, but at the same time this same individualized self-aware embodied self can fill us with unwanted, painful and unpleasant feelings and thoughts of despair, anxiety, doubt, fear, shame, guilt, jealousy, anger, frustration, hate, worry, lust and restlessness. All that messy stuff that comes with our humanity.
Yes, it is flawed in that having the experience of an embodied self-aware individualized self brings with it the painful knowledge and truth of its own futility and mental anguish of clinging, grasping and attaching to conceptual and conditioned life and the mind/body experience, with the self-realization and knowing that it too is impersonal, empty, transitory and temporary. In a certain way, individualized self-awareness is itself a double-edged sword in that it can successfully and permanently cut through the illusory lies and false promises of all that conditioned and conceptual life appears to have to offer us in the need for permanent happiness, love, reward, peace, success, recognition, praise and fulfilment, but at the same time this same individualized self-aware embodied self can fill us with unwanted, painful and unpleasant feelings and thoughts of despair, anxiety, doubt, fear, shame, guilt, jealousy, anger, frustration, hate, worry, lust and restlessness. All that messy stuff that comes with our humanity.
Obviously whatever we interpret and see this world to be, it does not have the real capacity to remain available to us indefinitely. Certainly not in a personal and permanent way. It all has to be given up in the end. No matter how much money, status or possessions have been acquired, accumulated and stored up; no matter how much success, fame, wealth, status, authority and investments have been earned and bought to protect and keep our livelihoods and lives safe, important and secure, it will all be lost to us in the end. The body and mind which appears to us to house the self-aware embodied subject of experience and experiencing does not last forever, and so with their disappearance, the self-aware individualized subject of experience vanish too. This is the impermanence and emptiness of it all.
This seemingly harsh truth of worldly reality can itself be a burden and disappointment to us. It can potentially make engaging with life in a fully open, positive, fearless, free and honest way extremely hard, challenging, confusing, frustrating and disappointing. It is not really anyone's fault that things and the world are like this. It is simply the way things are. No one is to blame, even if we might look to do this. The only real cause of death is birth. There might be many different circumstances, conditions and situations that lead to death, but it only has one real cause and that is birth. Birth and death are inseparable. One defining the other. No birth, no death. No beginning, no end. No inside. No outside. The self-aware individualized embodied self has a beginning and therefore it too has an end. Plain and simple. Of course this is blatantly clear to us and yet we can still have a hard time completely accepting it. This is why we endeavour to find and know that which transcends it. The Self of self. The truth of all that is illusionary.
What is this?
Who am I?
THE EMPTY SELF
We, as an individualized embodied self-aware self and mental construct, mostly live our lives in a very fragile, uncertain, ever-changing and demanding world where we can be physically or mentally invaded and troubled at any time by unexpected and expected changes, demands, dramas and challenges. The phenomenal world and all its creations and forms potentially and continuously imposing itself on the bodily senses; tempting us with things to desire, crave, want, love, hate or avoid. Never really knowing whether our personal circumstances and situations will favor us or not, and if they do favor us how long they will last. This can be the on-going uncertainty and vulnerability of life that makes us restless, anxious, frustrated, upset, fearful and even depressed. It can be so overwhelming and confusing at times simply because we are presented with so much to potentially please and busy the senses with. Even the things that repulse us. The on-going and ever-changing mental, physical and emotional burden that can come with trying to choose, acquire, have and keep the things we desire to want, acquire and have, and to remain separated and rid of the things we desire and crave not to want, acquire and have. Our frustration and dis-ease can simply be with coming to terms with what conditioned and conceptual life is and the on-going challenges, changes, dramas and demands it presents in our on-going attempt to make our worldly desires and needs of life achievable, sustainable and permanently favorable and pleasing to us. Again, I can assure you, that I am not trying to get down on life and saying that all of life is bad. There is definitely a quiet and palpable beauty and joy to be found in all that life is despite its limitations. I am simply attempting to point us to the origin, essence and source of all experience and experiencing rather than the on-going chasing and having of experiences, as a way to wake us up to the truth of reality, experience and identity. This is the with the intent and motivation for us to recognize and know our true boundless nature and essence. This is the one Reality that is all Reality.
Genuinely our true selfless nature and essence is not really concerned or burdened with these things. Self-importance and self-gratification have their root in the appearance and disappearance of the mind/body experience. The individualized self-aware identification and attachment with the mind/body experience can be the obstacle to us actually recognizing, realizing and knowing essentially who we really are and what reality is, as they create the idea and feeling of 'one' who appears to be in bondage and one who desires liberation. But the very idea that there is a permanent 'I' or 'me' who is in bondage and needs liberation is the real illusion. The true essence, source and nature of all life is completely unburdened, untroubled, unaffected, unchanging, unthreatened and totally free of all that is. Therefore regardless of all appearances, forms, situations, dramas and circumstances it is always free, fulfilled, complete, whole, plentiful, unburdened, ever-present and at peace.
THE PERENNIAL TRUTH
I am fully aware that it has all been said time and time again by many spiritual masters, mystics and self-help teachers that all living forms seek to be permanently happy and free of misery and dis-ease. It is said that all living forms seek to be free of the burdens and challenges of the mind/body experience, and to find and fully attain permanent joy, happiness, certainty, fulfilment and peace in all that life is.
It can be very easy to take a look at the world with all its demands, imperfections and challenges to feel a sense of hopelessness and frustration with all that it is. Even when you simply consider the misery and hardship we ourselves as a species have created for others and the planet as a whole through our own on-going desire, need and pursuit of personal power, wealth, security, success, fame, self-gratification, status, recognition and self-importance. And yet these very challenges exist in relationship to there being a mind/body experience. They are all part of our humanity. The hopelessness and frustration with life can simply be a temporary consequence of the human condition itself because it requires and needs so much to make it permanently sustainable, manageable, fulfilling and rewarding. It can be very challenging to realize that at times we have little or no control over how events and situations in our lives play or turn out. With the best will in the world we are sometimes left helpless and hopeless in our attempts to make and keep worldly circumstances and conditions permanently favorable for us and others. The truth is, even if it not always obvious to us, that we continuously manage and live our lives with an uncertainty and vulnerability that is always with us as a result of our own human condition. It is all an impersonal and ever-changing consequence of our own embodied and living humanity.
All this simply because of the way that things are. What it created can be destroyed. What is built can be broken. What is acquired can be taken away. What is gained can be lost. What is born, dies. Even if we do manage to obtain a certain level of success and fulfilment through acquiring various worldly conditions, objects, experiences and situations we have no real certainty in how long it will all last. All our lives, no matter who we are, are always governed by change, impermanence and uncertainty. This is not for us to have the attitude of seeing life as bad, worthless or wrong, and as punishing, shameful, cruel and unfair. It is simply to see things for what they are. With gaining genuine clarity for the way things are, we stop attaching the idea of permanence to that which is impermanent. We stop clinging to that which is always changing and disappearing. We begin to recognize and know how we suffer as a consequence of trying to hold on to all that is impermanent, empty, transient and unreal. We openly and honestly begin to recognize, see and know the 'emptiness' of all things. We clearly see that all things are made out of 'emptiness' and are of 'emptiness'. We genuinely accept that 'emptiness' is the real nature, essence and source of all things and creations. Recognizing and knowing 'emptiness' is what frees us from all that life is. It is all a window into our true enduring and ever-present Self.
All this simply because of the way that things are. What it created can be destroyed. What is built can be broken. What is acquired can be taken away. What is gained can be lost. What is born, dies. Even if we do manage to obtain a certain level of success and fulfilment through acquiring various worldly conditions, objects, experiences and situations we have no real certainty in how long it will all last. All our lives, no matter who we are, are always governed by change, impermanence and uncertainty. This is not for us to have the attitude of seeing life as bad, worthless or wrong, and as punishing, shameful, cruel and unfair. It is simply to see things for what they are. With gaining genuine clarity for the way things are, we stop attaching the idea of permanence to that which is impermanent. We stop clinging to that which is always changing and disappearing. We begin to recognize and know how we suffer as a consequence of trying to hold on to all that is impermanent, empty, transient and unreal. We openly and honestly begin to recognize, see and know the 'emptiness' of all things. We clearly see that all things are made out of 'emptiness' and are of 'emptiness'. We genuinely accept that 'emptiness' is the real nature, essence and source of all things and creations. Recognizing and knowing 'emptiness' is what frees us from all that life is. It is all a window into our true enduring and ever-present Self.
The 'I-am' of I am.
CLARITY AND INSIGHT
A selection of spiritual, mystics and self-help teachers, both past and present, would say to you that we are here to establish the truth, insight and knowledge of pure 'Spirit' in order to be free of the temporary mind-made illusions of lack, bondage, limitation, fear and death. In choosing to closely investigate and examine the true nature of reality, experience and identity we soon recognize that finding permanent fulfilment in the stuff of life can only fulfil us temporarily as all things have to eventually return to their source, 'emptiness', from which they came. All that appears, shows up and comes to us in experience and experiencing eventually decays, departs, changes and disappears, and so too with the self-aware individualized embodied self. What we acquire in conceptual and conditioned life can be taken from us and this includes having and experiencing life itself. What we are invited to endeavour to do in the esoteric pursuit and fulfilment of Self-realization and spiritual-awakening is to intimately and directly find and know that selfless, formless and undying Self, which is not acquired, created, made, gained, formed, changing, conditioned, born or found. This is the 'I-am' I speak of. It is freedom itself. It is that which we already are. It is the ever-present and abiding 'I-am' of I am. Its bliss is our natural state. Death cannot threaten it or touch it and so too with all creations.
We are all invited to establish a direct and intimate experiential Self-realization and ownership of the undying and unchanging source, essence and origin of all creation and forms. For me, this is not something acquired, created, formed, conditioned, constructed, given, attained or found, as it already is. Only our mistaken worldly individualized identity and strong attachment with the mind/body experience as who and what we are obscures and keeps us from this transcendental knowing, knowledge and Truth. I would say to you, to find the real Self of the self we must give up the false self and then it will all become clear. This Self is free of time, space and form. The light and radiance of the Self shines as it always did. This recognition and knowing of 'emptiness' is what fully frees us from the limiting grip of all illusion. Its very nature is freedom.
This transcendental truth of what reality, experience and identity are, that I speak of, is always present, here and now, whether it is recognized, known or not. How we see or know the world doe not alter it, affect it, change it, lessen it, threaten it, hinder it, improve it, impact it, touch it or destroy it. It is always free and boundless, no matter what. This is the ultimate truth of Reality and all is this.
We are all invited to establish a direct and intimate experiential Self-realization and ownership of the undying and unchanging source, essence and origin of all creation and forms. For me, this is not something acquired, created, formed, conditioned, constructed, given, attained or found, as it already is. Only our mistaken worldly individualized identity and strong attachment with the mind/body experience as who and what we are obscures and keeps us from this transcendental knowing, knowledge and Truth. I would say to you, to find the real Self of the self we must give up the false self and then it will all become clear. This Self is free of time, space and form. The light and radiance of the Self shines as it always did. This recognition and knowing of 'emptiness' is what fully frees us from the limiting grip of all illusion. Its very nature is freedom.
This transcendental truth of what reality, experience and identity are, that I speak of, is always present, here and now, whether it is recognized, known or not. How we see or know the world doe not alter it, affect it, change it, lessen it, threaten it, hinder it, improve it, impact it, touch it or destroy it. It is always free and boundless, no matter what. This is the ultimate truth of Reality and all is this.
This is the message of Atman-Yoga. The Deathless Self alone is as the ever-present 'I-am'.
Atman-Yoga Daily Mantra: "I am. Life is. I am one with all life and all life is one with me. Oneness in body. Oneness in mind. Oneness in all things."
Atman-Yoga Daily Mantra: "I am. Life is. I am one with all life and all life is one with me. Oneness in body. Oneness in mind. Oneness in all things."
Atman-Yoga Daily Meditation: 'Only God is Real' as the eternal 'I-am'. All is this.
Song of the Deathless Yogi:
I am 'emptiness'. All is 'emptiness'. 'Emptiness' is all.
Form is 'emptiness'. Only 'emptiness'. 'Emptiness' is form'.
This esoteric blog is dedicated to my earthly mother 'Rita' who transitioned on the 12th December 2021. A truly selfless, kind, beautiful and loving embodied soul, friend and mother.
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